Men protect and provide for others but often don’t care or show concern for themselves. Whether it is they don’t have enough time or literal distrust doctors, men, in general, are not good keepers of their health. They have to be on the brink of death before they go see the doctor.

I conducted a very informal survey of men of various ages who were of African American and Hispanic descent to try to understand why men have such opposition to going to the doctor. In my research, I was shocked to find that some men were getting the message about going to the doctor and it wasn’t just because the women in their lives were begging and demanding that they do so. Many admitted that they go get their basic annual check-ups but confessed that their sudden change in habit was due to a major life change or a health scare that could have evolved into something more serious.

In his early thirties, Demez White was not a guy that always went to the doctor. But in 2016 when his heart gave him a scare, he changed his tuned. His worries could have been alleviated if he had just gone to the doctor sooner. But he was under the impression that he could “shake it off.” Calling it a “man thing,” Demez said if he was feeling bad or sick he would jus shake it off. Shaking it off is no longer working. “At 34, my body is getting to a point where I can no longer simply shake things off. Doctors can be a hassle - the expenses, co-pays, waiting, potentially bad news, etc. But when I weighed that against what could happen, it became an easy choice. ” Demez took a long look at his priorities and made his healthcare priority #1.

That “I am too tough for a doctor” attitude is what Brian Barefield believed in for a while too. Brian was under the impression that being sick meant that you were weak and you’re weakest when you need to see the doctor. Since men are taught to be strong, Brian didn’t want to appear weak, so no doctor. Besides, he figured since he was a man he could handle whatever sickness came his way. Because that is what men do. He knows better now and sees the doctor regularly. Plus, he has taken on the task to be his brother’s keeper by advocating for other men to get regular check-ups.

In the same age bracket is William Ealy who brings another reason to light for not going to the doctor. William was raised old school under the belief that anything he had grandma had a remedy that could fix. Call it Country Boy Medicine. “Growing up in Arkansas, the doctor was the last option,” said William. Today, he stills only goes to the doctor if something is wrong. William, grandma can’t fix everything. Go to the doctor.

Another gentleman who wished to remain anonymous admitted that living life just got in the way of him going to the doctor. “Honestly, its been hard maintaining regular doctor visits over the past few years with major life changes like getting married, having kids, losing jobs and finding jobs in this cut throat corporate America.” He continued, “We know that it’s important but doctor visits always end up getting put on hold.” Keeping him somewhat in line are the women in his life, that he is grateful for, that constantly stay on him to get check ups. Also weighing on this man’s mind was a lack of trust of doctors. He suggests the need for more doctors that are minorities that look like him and can know and understand.

Now that we know some of the whys men are not going to the doctor, let us take a look at the reasons why men do go to the doctor. We already know the influence of woman goes a long way into pushing a man to the doctor but there are other factors. Research indicates that old age and major life changes as proponents for men to take a more active role in their healthcare.

Dr. Jonathan Chism, husband, and father of a young son, agrees. His family is his life and he doesn’t want to miss a moment with them. “Diabetes, high blood pressure, and other illnesses are in my family history. Although I try to eat healthy, I know it is important to detect any potential problems early as possible and not wait to the last second. Life is too valuable and precious,” said Dr. Chism. He regularly gets checkups, eats healthy, and exercises. “We must prioritize our health especially as we grow older.”

I once heard a comedian say, “Black people get emergency care, not preventative care.” That way of thinking has to change or we will continue to lose our men at ages far too young. I am glad to see that some men are taking initiative to go to the doctor on their own for preventative care and encouraging other males to follow suit. After years of begging and pleading, it seems the message is getting through. Men are learning that the “man thing” to do is to go to the doctor as it is just another way of providing for their family to ensure that you will be there for many days to come. Thank you, men, for finally listening and getting the message to go to the doctor.